Speedy Gonzales

I'm home from the hospital. That might be the only coherent sentence you'll read in this blog. I live by the mantras "better living through chemistry" and "where there's a pain, there's painkiller." Let me just tell you a little bit about the last48 hours or so...
I guess it started early Thursday morning when I drove the boys to Quincy to meet my Mom. She is one brave lady and is taking care of them until next Saturday, homeschool and all! Noah informed me that he might not have time to talk to me all this week because he was going to be busy being spoiled by Grammy. He also told me that he likes Grammy's house a whole lot more than our house because Grammy lets him eat whatever he wants and if he doesn't like it....well, she'll make him something else. I'm cool with that. I'm just glad that my kids have such wonderful Grandparents and Great-grandparents. I just wish we could spend more time together. Levi and Justin are best friends. They only had eyes for each other while we were in Quincy. Back to Noah....he called me 5 times on Thursday. I'm glad he's not too busy for his gimpy ol' mom!
On to the meat of this blog, surgery day. I have to say, I was so nervous, so incredibly nervous. I don't like anesthesia, I don't deal well with pain and I abhor being out of control. Not a good combination. But here's the deal. That morning I woke up with an incredible calm. I only cried one time during the pre-operation time and that was because the nurse asked me where my boys were (this is the first time I've been away from Elijah for any length of time). Then the nurse realized I needed to "girl" talk so we started in our big calves and how we both really want those boots that go up over our calves and we can't find any that fit. I know, weird, but it's what I needed. The anesthesiologist was this cute, young Russian doctor with such a fantastic accent....he gave me the giggles. Especially when he started talking about how I would fall "aslip". Then Dr. S, the man himself, came sauntering in with his coffee and wet jacket on, as if this were an every day occurrence and asked if I had any questions. I told him I didn't have any questions because I made the mistake of looking up an osteotomy on line. He gave me this perplexed and slightly amused look and said "well, that wasn't a good idea. Even the video?" I think I amuse him. Or at least I think I'm that funny as to amuse those around me. I still chuckle when I picture his face after I told him I needed this surgery done after soccer season. He looked at me like "you play soccer?" I figure as long as I can make someone laugh, then I'm good!
Once the parade of doctor's was done, it was time to head back to the surgery room. It was a lot more ghetto than I thought. I'm sure it was sterile, it just wasn't Grey's Anatomy pristine. And I was sorely disappointed that the cute Russian doctor wasn't there, I wanted him to put me to "slip". Adorable. The next thing I know I'm in the recovery room, cracking jokes with the nurses. The nurse said as long I was making her laugh, my oxygen levels were fine, but the minute I stopped, the levels dropped. I told her not to encourage me. :)
When it was all said and done, the time from pre-op to post-op was 3 hours. Then the real fun began....
I knew I was in trouble when the first thing I heard from my neighbor was a rather large burp. Mabel was the 88 year old patient in the bed next to me. She had company all day long, loud company. The only way I slept was with my headphones on (thank you Johny for the pink ear buds!). Then, when all the company left, she started in on her moaning and groaning. From 8 until 11:00, she burped and cried and moaned and groaned and gagged. Finally, at 11:15, she threw-up. All over herself. Boy was that smell pleasant! I called the nurses in, then flipped on all the lights and spent the next hour cleaning herself up. I did get to watch "what not to wear", though. I guess that's the bright side. They finally got enough drugs in Mabel that she fell asleep from 1-2a.m. Then I woke up to her gagging again. It turns out that she was sticking her finger down her throat to make herself sick. And then she told me she wanted to throw herself out the window...luckily the nurses told her they were locked. I'll wrap up this story by telling you that I finally slept after they moved me in to a new room at 7:00 this morning. I'm going to keep praying for Mabel.
I never knew such excitement could come from getting up and going to the bathroom or how hard it would be to go up and down stairs. I took an awful lot for granted. Even putting on my own undies. Yikes! We won't go there....
I do have to say that I loved the nurses at the hospital. They were all extremely compassionate and giving. Not that I would wish surgery upon any of you, but Anderson was a good place to be.
Thank you for all your prayers. They were felt and are much appreciated. Please continue to pray for us. There is still a high risk of infection, blood cots, rejection of the bone in my leg, etc. Not to mention a high risk of Johnny and I beating each up before these 6 weeks of disability are up.
Stay tuned, I still have to tell you about my last few nights at wal-mart!